Notes from a Psychologist
Dr. Mel Whitehurst

The purpose of Notes from a Psychologist is to encourage and inspire the spread of realistic optimism and hope.  Optimistic thinkers tend to be happier and healthier. I'll keep posting new ideas periodically.

A SIMPLE SYSTEM FOR SIMPLE THINKERS DOING QUIETLY MEANINGFUL WORK

I am a proud member of THE ASSOCIATION OF INTERMITTENT THINKERS.  We are an optimistic, non-bureaucratic organization.  We have no bylaws, no policies, no rules, no membership list, and certainly no committees.  We do not hold meetings or get-togethers of any kind.  We simply set around and from time-to-time, think. 

To join all you have to do is silently say to yourself, “I’m now a member” and poof you are automatically enrolled.  If you can think, even intermittently, you qualify.

All you need to do is have at least one thought a day---or every few days---that you believe will make the world a better place.  Write your thoughts down and save them until you have one week’s worth of thoughts.  Pick one and publish it on either Facebook, LinkedIn, or other social media platforms.  Then start all over. 

Keep it up for five or six weeks, and you've earned a lifetime membership in a very special group: people who genuinely want to bring more hope and positivity to the world.

Just think how helpful your efforts could become if only one of your thoughts changed someone else’s life from despair to hope.

                                          I QUIT

I hated playing football during my high school years.  I did it because I wanted to belong.  Then, somewhat irrationally I began playing in college.  A scholarship paid my way, and I had very little money, so I stayed with it for a while. 

For eight long years, I played a game I did not like—until one day, I quit! 

Many years later, I came to see this as a major turning point in my life. Quitting was not a sign of failure; it was a decision for me to take responsibility.

My quitting experience taught me to periodically look over my life activities, and when I can, quit those things that do not serve me well.  It simplifies my life.  

And over the years, I believe I’ve become a fairly effective “quitter".

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                      GET ME MY DANCING SHOES

I’m preparing to begin ballroom dancing lessons so I’ll be ready for the grand opening of the new White House ballroom. The only complication is that I’ll be dancing with a cane. Until now, I’ve only used it for walking—and for whacking anyone who gets in my way.

Has anyone ever seen a ballroom cane dancer? I suspect the dancing will be far more entertaining than starting a war or organizing an insurrection.

So far, not a single person has volunteered to be my dance partner---at last, something Republicans and Democrats can agree on.

THIS COURAGEOUS TINY ANT TAUGHT ME A VALUABLE LESSON

From time-to-time I believe it’s important that we take a look inside ourselves to see if we need to make a change in our attitude as a result of our experiences.  I had one of these “change of attitude” experiences the other day.

Occasionally I sit on my patio to relax.  Some days an ant makes its way to my ankle and gives it a good bite.  Needless to say, I’ve developed a snarly attitude toward ants until yesterday when, with my bug spray in hand, I noticed one little ant walking across the patio from the far side with a tiny piece of a leaf.  I watched the little ant zig-zag and labor tenaciously for a half hour or so trying to get to the ant bed just outside the patio.  To my amazement, he eventually made it. I really admired that little ant for his unrelenting struggle. So, I picked up my can of bug spray and took it back into the garage.  How could I have been so heartless to think I was planning to harm the little fellow.

My take away from this experience is that perhaps I should make more effort in respecting and understanding other people’s struggles and not be so quick to make judgments when they are really only struggling to survive.

“DID YOU EVER READ ABOUT A FROG WHO DREAMED OF A BEING A KING AND THEN BECAME ONE?” 

Just like the frog in Neil Diamond’s song, I dreamed of being a hero when I was a kid.  I imagined I was Gene Autry riding my horse chasing outlaws, Supper Man flying around everywhere saving people, Flash Gordon flying from planet to planet after Ming the Merciless, on and on with other idolized characters.  I really wanted to be a hero.  Unfortunately, my dream crashed, mainly because my definition of an all-powerful hero never existed.

Heros have no magical powers.  They are ordinary people, who act courageously and selflessly in catastrophe situations.  They are ordinary people who stand up for what is right even at great personal risk.  They are ordinary people who do not harm others.  They ordinary people who do not go around “hating.”  They are ordinary people who family and friends can depend on.  The are ordinary people who always seem to be able to do the right thing.

There are a lot of heroes running around in this world unnoticed.  They pass by us every day, unseen.